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Archive for March, 2010

Last night I was fooled by this 3 1/2 pound brain of mine into all sorts of false beliefs.  Arghhh… where is the peace a child of God has, I wondered?  Among the thoughts are condemnation, that I have lost my peace because I have not been walking closely with God.  Which is true, but God never condemns, He is more than happy to forgive and love – provided we come before Him asking for forgiveness.  Still struggling to rid of my busy mind, I prayed,

“God, why am I struggling with these thoughts?  They are untrue!  We have dealt with them before, and I know that they are untrue!  Why do they still entangle me?!”

Silent from above, except for the troubling thoughts which wouldn’t go away.

“God, where is the peace You promised?  I am still troubled!  Help!”

Nothing.

Then I remembered our pastor’s preaching on prayer – come before God with a cleansed heart, that’s when our prayers will be heard.  When we have grudges and sins in our hearts, we are not pure before God and the communication line will be “interfered”.  So whenever the pastor led us in prayer before the service, he always led us in a forgiveness prayer, because God has promised in 1 John 1:9 that if we are willing, He will cleansed us and make us whole and acceptable before Him again.

“Father, I am sorry I have put myself first before You, I have filled my mind with Satan’s thoughts instead of meditating on truth You have given me.  Please forgive me.”

*KaBoom!* my head was immediately cleared!  Faster than the speed of light God delivered on His promise!  Is that awesome or what????  I couldn’t even imagine what I was struggling with!  The evil one has been conquered by the King!  Hallelujah!

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Close to You

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I heard this song on the radio this morning and the lyrics made me laugh – “3 1/2 pounds of brain try to figure out”.  Yes, I am always fooled by my own ‘wisdom’, thinking that I can figure out everything under the sky!  Not to mention every other trick my mind puts me through – what I can’t do right, things always happen this way and that, guilt trip…  and I have to tell myself that “I’m not going crazy.  Things do not always turn out a flop.  It’s not the end of the world.  There is God.  And He IS big enough.”

None of us knows and that makes it a mystery
If life is a comedy, then why all the tragedy
Three-and-a-half pounds of brain try to figure out
What this world is all about
And is there an eternity, is there an eternity?

God if You’re there I wish You’d show me
And God if You care then I need You to know me
I hope You don’t mind me askin’ the questions
But I figure You’re big enough
I figure You’re big enough

Lying on pillows we’re haunted and half-awake
Does anyone hear us pray, “If I die before I wake”
Then the morning comes and the mirror’s the other place
Where we wrestle face to face with the image of Deity
The image of Deity

God if You’re there I wish You’d show me
And God if You care then I need You to know me
I hope You don’t mind me askin’ the questions
But I figure You’re big enough
I figure You’re big enough

When I imagine the size of the universe
And I wonder what’s out past the edges
Then I discover inside me a space as big
And believe that I’m meant to be
Filled up with more than just questions

So, God if You’re there I wish You’d show me
And God if You care then I need You to know me
I hope You don’t mind me askin’ the questions
But I figure You’re big enough
I figure You’re big enough
‘Cause I am not big enough

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I think I have read somewhere about frowning – it takes more muscles to frown then to smile (therefore, smile!), have also read about anger killing brain cells.  Guess it is not a good recommendation to be angry or remain angry – probably not healthy.

It’s hard though sometimes to hold my anger back.  Many little things trigger my anger – can’t get my way, hidden bitterness re-surfacing, somebody crossing my boundary.  When I am angry I would frown (naturally) and if I know that the circumstance does not accept an outburst, I often choose to withdraw and remain passive (in case I do explode uncontrollably).

The other day we drove past the midst of town and a lady ran across the road while yelling at the same time.  Initially I thought she was talking to her friend across the road, but coming closer I realise that it is not so.  She was screaming and swearing across the road to another lady, expressing her discontent about something or somebody.  She looked really angry.  The first thing that came into my mind was the fact that this young lady, not bad-looking at all I must say, looked rather ugly at that moment.  I was immediately taken aback by how ugly this world is and how angry people can get.  I have forgotten the little incident back home that morning when I was not too different from that lady in the street, airing my lungs because I was angry with my family.  Is this God’s joke, trying to show me how distasteful anger is and looks?  Dear me, I was stunned by this revelation.

Thank you Lord, for showing me that my ways do not glorify nor please You.  Forgive me.

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I very seldom come across the “speak to me, Bible” experience, but this morning it was one of those moments when I read.  I was reading (very slowly) Psalm 34 this week and as I come to verses 4 and 5, it took my breathe away.

“I sought the Lord, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.  Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.” Psalm 34:4-5 (emphasis mine)

Even though I know He is all-knowing and all-present, but it still strike me whenever it speaks to me in the face, “hey, I know what you are going through and how you are feeling, Girl!  And it’s ok.”  He is never tired of reassuring and comforting me, the Lord is good.

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Continual praise

Today’s devotion on Back to the Bible is on continual praise based on Psalm 34:1-3. I was curious to find out more about praising the Lord at all times as David pointed out in the psalm and I found this article which is simple yet to the point – it sets out simply the how/who/why of continual praise.

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This morning I prayed for joy, peace and love in all our hearts, this verse came into my head,

“I am the vine; you are the branches.  If a man remains in me and me in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”  John 15:5.

No matter how hard I try to love, or remain peaceful or appear joyous, my effort is in vain; because I do not have Christ’s heart and mindset.  There is nothing I can do to change that.  There is no peace in me because I do not have Christ in my heart or the driver’s seat, I am still yielding to my own desire and effort – to please others or to change the circumstances.

I can only pray that I may be emptied, and be filled with the spirit, if I desire love/peace/joy; as they are fruits of the Holy Spirit.

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