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This morning I struggled with a prayer of thanksgiving. I forgot where God is. How did I lose it all? How did giving thanks become superficial? Since when did I lose heart in prayers?

So I went back in memory. I don’t have battle wins as big as David’s to boost my God-confidence; or parting of the Red Sea like Moses did.

But God is in my life, how big or small the miracles are, He is in my life. He plucked me out of mirry clay (figuratively…). He brought me to see His grace, when I’ve come from nowhere. He gave me this life and I had not paid a price (thought I live with the consequences). He comforted and assured me of His presence when I was in doubt. Now I’m again reminded that was when I met my first love and that’s all it matters. Let me not forget this first love, not straybfrom it. Amen.

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Today’s resolution is I want to learn to chat with God, because He is a good listener, better than anyone else; He longs for me to yearn for His company, more than anyone else.

It reminds me of the book I’ve read a long time back, Father heart of God, while I cannot remember the story but I’m reminded of God’s longing for us.

Lord, may my longing for you be more and more each day, so that I’m dependent on you alone for my joy and passion. Amen

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My mother has disowned me.

Yes.  Disregarded my phone calls, ignored my social media post.

It feels weird and surreal, but I know I’ve brought this upon myself – I did something children shouldn’t do to elders.  As a result, I’ve got to live with the consequence.

This got me thinking, is this how separation from God feels like?  When God sees sins, He turns His face away.  We cannot look into God’s eyes because we know our sin, how dirty we are.  

No matter how good we may be in other areas of our lives – and we’d strive to do well in many other things to fill this inadequate feeling – it doesn’t take away the void of God’s doting.

I believe God uses everything in our lives, even our sins, to teach us about Himself.  So I pray that the hurt I’ve brought upon mum will heal; and this heartache will not be in vain – that I learn my lesson in life and God.  amen.

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2017 July 6

God’s good.  Even when I’m rubbish, or should I say WHEN I’m rubbish, God is good.

I was in despair today.  Looking at the amount of work to get through and not enough hours in the day, I grew more and more depressed.

Then I looked down on the desktop, and I saw this verse.  What a reminder!  Thank you Lord!

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Whatever human tries to do, it is inspired by nature, created by God.  We don’t create or start anything new, our ideas are from God.

Think flying.  Where do you think that had come from?  Birds.  Yes, who had created the birds?

Ever seen a flick of inflight birds?  I see them today, and they look awfully alike to the wonder fireworks try to depict. 

The next time I praise human hands, let me look to my Creator.

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2017 Jan 24

This is a keepsake from a good buddy of which​ I kept it at work to remind me of God’s words.

I chewed on today’s verse, I know  that God’s path lead to the everlasting; but what does the psalmist say?  That God’s path leads through the sea!  That can’t be easy, no walk in the park?  But it’s true, Jesus had said that it is not easy to be His follower (Luke 9:23).

God’s way is through the mighty waters.  Oh dear, as if through the sea isn’t enough!  Remember the parting of the Red Sea?  Those are mighty waters, but it is no trouble for the Creator – it formed walls on either side of the path at God’s command (Exodus 14:21-22), so that the Israelites can pass through; in keeping His promise to His people.

God, Your promise is everlasting, they never goes to void.  We forget and we fret so easily when we don’t see Your footprint by our side.  Remind us daily of Your presence with us, through the sea and the waters.  Help us follow your lead, amen.

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Never been a fan of new year resolution.

But perhaps THE year to start. To change some false beliefs.

1. I can change.  I am within my control.

2.  There’s nothing wrong with conflicts. Don’t need to avoid it like a plague, and definitely not to be stressed when it isn’t within my control.

3.  Admit there’s no value in arguments.  No one needs to be right all the time.  And can’t be, for that matter.

4.  Don’t sweat over none value-adding stuff.  Arguing being one of them.

5.  Write more blog posts.

Let’s see how I go.  Happy new year to all.

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